Peter Worries
by metaphoricheart
Summary: Peter always worries, especially about Edmund- a series of drabbles about Peter and Edmund that are based off the movies, books, and my own imagination. Brotherfic.
1. Introduction

_Hello! This is my first Narnia story that I'm willing to publish in a long time, and hopefully it goes well. Because I love Peter and Edmund fluff, this entire fic is basically drabbles. However, what you are about to read is just the intro, but an actual chapter will be posted shortly. The drabbles will not always be chronological or connected, and many events may be made up by only myself. _

_**While this all jolly and good there may be some heavy themes dealt with in this story. I will put warnings before each chapter and a rating. The over all story will be rated as T unless others think that it needs to be higher. It is your own responsibility to follow the warnings and my rating. I can't be responsible if you become triggered if you did not follow my trigger warnings, since I will try to be as specific as possible about them.**_

_I do not own Narnia or it's characters._

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><p>Peter worries. Peter always worries. Susan used to smile softly at him and pick up the simple tasks to give Peter one less thing to do. But Susan is not Queen Susan any longer, and only offers empty sentiments that everything will turn out for the better in time. Lucy quietly squeezes his hand or listens as he confides in her, eyes not meeting her's. Edmund rolls his eyes, and slaps his hand on Peter's shoulder. Edmund tells Peter he worries too much, and that he will get wrinkles at an untimely age. But Edmund is there every time Peter finally breaks.<p>

Edmund is also usually the reason Peter worries. Because Peter has seen his brother splinter into a thousand directions too many times; because Peter knows for all of Edmund's snarky smirks and burning intelligence, is a brother whom actions and words and events cut deeply, is a brother who still doubts after all these years if he is worthy.

Perhaps, part of the problem is that Peter and Edmund are so intrinsically linked, that one could no longer survive without the other. Perhaps, they are each other's greatest strengths as well as weaknesses.


	2. University

**Rating for this chapter: K+**

**Warnings: Besides general angst, there are none for this chapter.**

**I do not own Narnia or it's characters.**

**_I know it's a bit slow in the beginning, or maybe in general but I wanted to write something where they were having an honest conversation with each other. A lot of the conversations I see between them are too emotional or too fluffy and it just does not work because they don't end up resolving any issues. I wanted to try writing a better one. Hopefully I achieved that._**

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><p>It doesn't escape Peter's notice that Edmund is valiantly trying to avoid making eye contact with him across the dinner table. It doesn't escape Peter's notice that Lucy is holding Edmund's underneath the table. And it certainly doesn't escape Peter's notice that Edmund has only picked at the meal he'd normally wolf down with a content grin.<p>

Yet, Peter does not blame his brother for any of it because it is partially Peter's fault. Peter is going away and Edmund cannot follow. At least not for another three years. It should give Edmund some peace of mind that at least Peter isn't headed towards dangerous battle and trudging through unknown territories; Peter is simply going to University. But it does not give Edmund peace of mind, and Peter understands because they both know the pain and anxiety of the other leaving straight into peril. However, they have never experienced simple, good old separation from the other. They do not know how to deal with this. The other separation, while infinitely more anxiety ridden, is familiar- probably too familiar. But this, this type of separation is as foreign to them as the country, America, Susan has gone to.

To Edmund's credit, he has handled it all better than Peter expected- until tonight.

Mrs. Pevensie had cooked all of Peter's favorite food for the final dinner he would be having with them for a long time. Conversation was light, and a few laughs were shared, but it all felt forced. Lucy looked as if she would cry at any moment and she was shooting worried looks between Peter and Edmund. Susan managed to keep conversation rolling but kept looking at her watch, desperately waiting for the moment that her friends would arrive to whisk her away to a party. Mrs. Pevensie made sure everyone's plates were fully loaded with food and fidgeted with the worn hem of her apron. Edmund had said nothing, had barely lifted his eyes from his plate. And Peter tried to take care of them all but found it impossible and concentrated on just enjoying his food.

Abruptly, Edmund stood up from the table with a muttered sorry, and pounded up the stairs. Peter and Lucy locked eyes briefly, before Peter pushed his chair back and followed Edmund.

"Ed?" Peter knocked on the bathroom door.

The only sound that greeted Peter in response was a sniffle on the other side of the door.

"Eddie? Please, come out of there and talk to me." Peter leaned against the wall, and ran his fingers through his hair.

Still no answer.

Peter started to jiggle the locked door knob. He normally wouldn't have pushed this hard for Edmund to talk to him, but they didn't have much time left to talk. After a few minutes, Peter finally gave up, and fell silent.

He heard Edmund breathe a sigh of relief, but that relief was short lived because, "Edmund. Please."

The door flew open, Edmund's already perpetually messy hair standing on end from running his hands through it too many times, and eyes that were suspiciously bright.

"Can't I ever have a moment alone? Or get upset without you barging into everything?" Edmund shouted.

Peter withdrew the hand that was reaching for Edmund as if he'd been burned. Edmund stared at Peter's hand, then back at Peter, before pushing past his brother.

Peter snapped the last suitcase shut, and glanced out the window where he could see Edmund sitting underneath the large tree in the backyard, his head in his hands.

Flopping onto his head, Peter let out a sigh. He should have known better than to push Edmund too hard. He should know better than anyone that needs time to sort himself out before he can talk. Now Edmund may never talk, and Peter will leave and…and…was he really like that? Barging into everything? Trying to fix everything? Trying to keep everything away that could ever add more things that hurt inside Edmund…

The door to their bedroom opened and closed, leaving Peter looking at a remorseful looking little brother who was trying his best not to look at Peter for the second time that night.

"Ed?"

Peter tried, but Edmund did not reply. Instead he combed his hair and changed into his pajamas before settling on the edge of his bed.

He sat there for a full minute, swinging his legs and staring at his bare toes before speaking.

"I'm sorry for shouting at you. I didn't mean…didn't mean to hurt you…I just," Edmund drew in a shaky breath as he lost the words he had been rehearsing for an hour outside.

Peter sat up as Edmund opened his mouth again to continue, but cut him off, "I know, Eddie."

Edmund nodded, wiping his nose on his sleeve.

"I should have let you sort yourself out. I should have known better, I just didn't want to leave without talking about anything. But I'm sorry if I push myself too hard upon you when you need to be left alone. You don't need-"

"That's the problem, Pete. I need too much."

"What do you mean?"

"I need other people too much. You…you mostly though." Edmund stood up and began pacing the space between their beds. "But, I _shouldn't _need you or anyone else so much. I _should _be able to take care of myself. I _shouldn't need anyone, _Peter. I'm just…too…weak."

Edmund stopped pacing and rested his elbows on the window sill with his hands knotted in his hair.

"And now that I'm leaving for University, and I won't be around all the time you're afraid that you won't be able to handle anything," Peter said quietly.

"Exactly."

Peter walked up behind Edmund, and spun him around to face him.

"You, Edmund Pevensie, are not weak. Everyone needs someone. When Lucy…or when I come to you for help…do you think we're weak?"

"Of course not!"

"Well we don't think you're weak either. You're the strongest of all of us."

Edmund stood there contemplating that as Peter walked back to his bed and threw the covers back. "Come on, Ed. We should get some sleep."

Edmund followed Peter, threw back the covers to his own bed, and climbed in.

"By the way, it's not as if I am disappearing. You can call, you can write, and if you really need me I will find a way to come home."

"I know," Edmund replied as he settled down beneath his blankets. "Just promise me one thing."

"Hm?"

"Don't spend all your time worrying about me, Pete."

Peter snorted into his pillow. "I'll try Eddie, but you give me too many reasons to worry."


	3. Late Night Phonecall

**Rating for this chapter: K+**

**Warnings for this chapter: Nightmares but no detail is given about them so there is nothing to worry about here.**

**I've had this on my computer for a while and I figured this was a good place to put this story. Peter is it at University if it isn't clear.**

**My next chapter may be significantly darker than the first two.**

**I do not own Narnia or it's characters.**

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><p>Peter had his feet up on his desk, and was rubbing his eyes. He had a huge exam tomorrow, and was up late studying. He was just considering going to bed, when the phone on the desk rang.<p>

While picking up the receiver, Peter glanced at the clock. It was half past midnight, who could possibly be calling him at this hour unless something had happened?

"Hello?"

"P-peter," came a voice from the other line.

"Ed?"

Sniffle followed by a shaky breath. Definitely Edmund.

"Edmund? What's wrong?"

Now there was soft crying on the other end of the line.

"Why are you crying?" Peter probed, waiting for Edmund to answer. This was so much more difficult on the phone then in person, worry coiled hot in his stomach.

Peter heard Edmund gasping for air on the other line.

"Shh, it's going to be okay. In, and out."

Peter listened as Edmund slowly breathed in, and out until his breathing was steady.

"What's going on? Why are you calling me so late at night?" Peter bit back the "shouldn't you be in bed".

"You-you were dead…had to ch-check," Edmund's voice was strangled.

Peter wanted to smack himself. _Nightmares. _He should have known.

"Hey, hey," Peter said gently. "I'm not dead, I'm right here. It's okay. You're okay. I'm okay. Everyone's okay."

Edmund sniffled again. "I-I'm sorry…you must have been asleep."

"No, I was awake anyway- studying for an exam."

There was silence except for the occasional sniffle, and deep breath on the other line.

"You should go try to go back to sleep now," Peter said softly.

"I love you, Peter."

Peter drew in a sharp breath. Edmund didn't say "I love you" very often. He just sort of figured Peter should know by now anyway, so he saved it for when it was special. Apparently this was special. _What have you been dreaming, Eddie? _Peter thought. He wanted to ask, but it would probably send Edmund into a fit of hysterics, and they both really needed to get to sleep.

"I love you too, Eddie. Try to get some sleep."

"I will. Good luck with your exam."

"Thanks, night."


	4. Nothing to Prove

**Rating for this chapter: K**

**Warnings: None**

**I know I said I'd write something darker for the next chapter, but I realized I finally have a place for all the little stories I've written between Peter and Edmund, so this is another one that's been collecting dust on my computer. New material will be written soon, promise.**

**I do not own Narnia or it's characters.**

**This one takes place in Narnia by the way.**

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><p>Peter steps into Edmund's room, and his draw drops.<p>

"What is all of this?" He says as he sweeps his hands around the room.

"I believe they are called books," Edmund smirks at him.

Peter steps over all of the books scattered across the plush, carpeted floor. He reaches where Edmund is sitting, and nearly knocks another stack off the desk. "Susan would throw a fit if she saw this, Ed."

Edmund rolls his eyes. "What Susan doesn't know, won't hurt her."

"What in all of Narnia are you doing with all of these though?"

Edmund speaks to him as if he is a small child. "Well Peter, one usually _reads _them. Unless, of course, they are just there for decoration, which would be their function in your room."

"That's not what I meant, but fine Oh Smart One. Why are you reading them, then?"

Edmund stares at him as if he's grown three heads. "Because I have to!"

"You don't _have _to!" Peter says in exasperation as he grabs for the parchments in front of Edmund. Edmund makes a move to stop his brother, but Peter is too fast for him.

Edmund looks down at his hands as Peter scans what he has written. "I thought I told you not to worry about this right now, Edmund. I thought I said you could start, and then we'd work on it next Counsel. I didn't tell you to practically do the whole thing yourself!"

Edmund stays silent and Peter shakes his head as he reads through his little brother's plans for government and laws. Not only does if he have one plan, but five, with back up plans for each. And there are footnotes referencing the books he got the ideas from.

"This is really amazing, Ed…" Peter murmurs.

Edmund's head snaps up. "Do you think so?"

"Yes, I think so." Peter smiles, but it creases into a frown. "You don't have anything to prove you know. You deserve this, maybe more than any of us."

Edmund nods numbly, the doubt shadowing every feature of his face.

"You'll see someday." Peter claps his shoulder, and then trips over a pile of books before stumbling out of the room.

Much to Peter's exasperation, Edmund never sees.


	5. Locked Up

**Rating: K**

**Warnings: None**

**Just another one that was sitting on my computer.**

**I do not own Narnia or its characters.**

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><p>Peter watched as Edmund flicked the autumn leaves off his jacket sleeve with a slightly distressed expression.<p>

"Do you ever feel locked up?" Edmund asks abruptly.

Peter raises an eyebrow. "I'm not sure what you mean, Ed."

Edmund sighs and flops himself down onto the grass. "Nevermind," he mutters.

Peter studies Edmund as he crosses his long legs, and stares up at the slightly grey sky. There's been something entirely too guarded in his eyes these days.

Flopping down next to his fifteen year old brother, Peter says, "Maybe I do know, I just call it something different. I can't know unless you explain."

Instead Edmund remains silent, staring up at the sky with an unreadable expression.

After several silent minutes- "Do _you _ever feel locked up, Edmund?"

Peter sees Edmund stiffen. "Yes," he whispers.

Before Peter can say anything else Edmund rolls over, hauls himself to his feet, and brushes himself off.

"We should be getting back, it's almost dinner."


	6. Crossing the Line

**Rating for this chapter: K+**

**Warnings: Angst, anger, and mean Peter...but otherwise none.**

**This is based off of the PC Movie version of Peter. This story is a new one. I don't really like how this one is written, it's too choppy for my tastes but I have homework to attend to so I don't really feel like messing around with it.**

**I do not own Narnia or its characters.**

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><p>The sound of the front door opening, was accompanied by a shouting Peter. Lucy sighed in the kitchen, and marked her place in her book before snapping it shut. She couldn't quite make out what Peter was shouting about, but it didn't take much to guess. It also didn't take much to guess that a sullen Edmund would be trailing not far behind.<p>

"He shoved me first anyway! And then _you _had to step in and make it worse! I had it sorted," Peter finished bitterly as he entered the kitchen, soaked, and jacket dripping all over the floor from walking home in the rain.

And sure enough, Edmund was following behind him, his sopping hair hanging in front of his eyes. He leaned against the cabinets, shoulders slumping, watching as Peter stood at the sink filling a glass of water.

"Peter," he said quietly.

Peter whipped around to face his younger brother.

"You haven't been yourself in months; what's wrong?"

"I'm perfectly fine, you just keep meddling into my business," Peter said, voice low.

Edmund pushed his hair out of his eyes with a shaking hand.

"You're not "perfectly fine". Getting into fights, staying out until all hours of the morning, that's not "perfectly fine"."

Peter stayed silent. Edmund balled his fists into his jacket pockets to try to stop the shaking.

"You don't understand," Peter finally spoke.

"Well then help me to! If you would just _talk _to me, or-"

But Peter cut him off, and as Peter shouted, Edmund shrunk even more into his wet jacket.

"When are you ever going to get it through that thick skull of your's that I don't need you? I have never needed you and I will never need you!"

"Peter! You know that's not true," Lucy cut in, finally made her presence known in the argument.

But Peter ignored her, focusing only on Edmund whose hands were now gripping the counter so hard his knuckles were turning white.

"Why would anybody need _you. _Better yet, why would anyone _want you,_" Peter whispered harshly, hitting on all of Edmund's insecurities in two sentences.

Edmund didn't flinch, but locked eyes with Peter and stared for a long time, searching for something. He broke his gaze with a slight shake of his head, unable to find whatever he was looking for.

Peter turned away, and stomped up the stairs, muttering curses underneath his breath, leaving the kitchen silent.

Lucy tried to get a look at Edmund's face but his back was to her, and before she could say anything, he was leaving through the backdoor, straight back into the storm.

"Great," Lucy muttered as she pounded through the hall to get her raincoat and follow after her brother.

Hours later, as Peter paces in his bedroom listening to Edmund empty his stomach for the fourth night in a row, he feels the first pin prick of guilt settle in his heart.

_He _has made Edmund so anxious he can longer hold down any food. _He _had done this to Edmund. Not the White Witch. Not the fell creatures that attacked Cair Paravel in their first year. Not the Telmarines. He, _Peter._

Peter wants to apologize, but the words are stuck hot and thick in his throat. His body cold with remorse and anger at Aslan.

When Edmund does not return to their room that night, Peter finds him asleep in the girl's room. Susan and Lucy whispering over him. Peter feels like an outsider looking on the family he is slowly breaking.

He has crossed an invisible line tonight, and none of them are sure if they can ever go back.


	7. Not Scared

**Rating for this chapter: K**

**Warnings: None but too much fluffy cuteness.**

**Okay, okay I know it's all too cute and lovely...but writing something darker takes more time and energy to do it right...so that will have to wait.**

**I do not own Narnia or its characters.**

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><p>"Edmund! Get away from there!"<p>

Mrs. Pevensie pulled Edmund away from watching the storm outside the window, and handed him over to Peter.

"Go get ready for bed with Peter, love."

Peter hid his smile as he pulled his pajama shirt over his head. Edmund was jumping at every crack of thunder, and his face was turning paler by the second making it very easy for someone to count every single freckle on his chubby cheeks.

"I thought you said being scared of storms was for four year olds like Lucy. Not a 'big six year old' like you," Peter quoted.

Edmund scowled at his older brother. "I am _not _scared!"

"If you say so," Peter said climbing into bed.

"I hope I never turn nine years old. You are in-suff-er-ably annoying," Edmund shot back, stumbling over the new word he had picked up from their mother earlier that day.

"There's not much you can do about getting older, Ed."

"That's what you think, but Susan's book says differently."

"That story Susan read to you is not real, Edmund. You know that," Peter said tiredly, his eyes slipping shut.

"Susan said that too. But I think you two are no fun. You are just as bad as mummy saying magic isn't real," Edmund said stubbornly, climbing into his own bed.

Peter made no move to reply, tired of bickering with Edmund for the night.

The storm waged on, bending the tree branches, and the moon slipped behind a cloud, making their bedroom suddenly pitch black.

"Peter?"

"Hm?"

"I…I'm sc- I'm cold."

Peter smiled to himself as he patted his bed, and Edmund scampered over. He was finally starting to fall asleep when-

"Peter?"

"What?"

"The tree…the tree isn't going to fall on us is it?"

"No, go to sleep Eddie."

"You don't know what the tree is going to do!"

"I promise you the tree will not fall on you. But I will make you go back to your own cold bed if you don't keep quiet."


	8. Memories

**Rating for this chapter: K**

**Warnings: None**

**This was another that was just sitting on my computer for months. Don't worry, I have something heavy planned for the next chapter (if I don't find anything else lying around my computer that I feel the need to publish). **

**I do not own Narnia or its characters.**

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><p>Peter spotted Edmund sitting on the stone walls of one of the gardens, wrapped tightly in his cloak, staring off into the distance. Going around the back, Peter entered the garden, and climbed the latter so he was sitting next to Edmund. Edmund nodded in acknowledgement of his brother's presence, but went back to staring at the snow on the ground. Peter studied him for a minute, he hadn't really seen much of his younger brother in the last week. Edmund had taken to rising early, and disappearing for most of the day, and was only seen late at night. Peter noted the dark circles under Edmund's eyes, indicating nightmares, before speaking.<p>

"Where have you been running off to all week? We miss you being around us," Peter smiled at him, masking the rock of worry weighing down in his stomach.

"Um, just off riding, reading in the library, that sort of thing."

"I've been stuck with Susan fussing over Christmas decorations, and Lucy keeps commenting on the absence of a certain someone," Peter looked pointedly at Edmund when he said the last part.

"All the more reason to stay away if Susan is fussing over decorations, you know how she gets," Edmund tried to joke, but Peter wasn't buying it. Peter laughed for him though.

They lapsed into a comfortable silence, while Peter pretended to be staring off at some centaurs bringing in Christmas trees, but was really watching Edmund from the corner of his eye. A few minutes later the centaurs had disappeared, and so had Edmund into his thoughts.

"What are you thinking about, Ed?" Peter asked quietly.

Edmund jerked out of his thoughts. Peter could practically see the debate going on his brother's head: whether to tell the truth or make up some lie that won't go unnoticed anyway.

"Just some memories," he said lightly. It's wasn't a lie, but it's not entirely truthful either.

Peter didn't know what to say to that, so he went with commenting about the weather. "You should come inside, it's too cold to be sitting out here."

"I'm always cold anyway, not going to make much of a difference," Edmund muttered bitterly.

Peter sighed, and brushed some falling snow out of Edmund dark hair. "Is that what you're thinking about?" He murmured softly.

Edmund nodded mutely. "Is that why you've been keeping to yourself all week?"

"Yes. I needed to sort myself out..and I'm not the most fun person to be around when I'm like…this."

"We don't care what you're like, we want you around," Peter told him firmly.

"I'm sorry," Edmund said softly.

Peter ignored this, and jumped off the wall, extending his hand out for Edmund to take. "How about you come inside, and stop sulking?"

Edmund laughed and took his hand. "Okay, as long as I don't have to put up Christmas decorations."

Peter smiled at him in return. "Of course not, we'll avoid Susan like the plague."


	9. Laughter

**Rating for this chapter: K+**

**Warnings: None**

**So...this isn't really what I wanted to be writing, but I was working on this so I finished it. I want to write something with a heavier theme but I don't know if my writing is good enough to pull it off. Every time I try to write the way I want to, it doesn't work and this comes out instead...**

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><p>"How long do you suppose until it stops, Pete?"<p>

"I don't know," Peter replied from his spot on the floor of the cave they had taken shelter in from the raging storm outside.

Edmund groaned and began pacing and kicking up dust on the floor while Peter eyes' silently followed him.

A particularly loud clap of thunder and bright flash of lightening caused Edmund's face to pale and his hands to shake. Still, Peter said nothing even as Edmund finally sank to the floor, and leaned his head back on the wall, his adam's apple moving rapidly with nervous swallows.

"You should have let me stay back at Cair," Edmund moaned.

"And let you continue drowning yourself in work and spending hours on end in the library?" Peter snorted, finally speaking

"Yes, actually. That is exactly what you should have done," Edmund muttered.

Peter did not reply. They had been through this more times than he could count. Edmund did not need Peter to reply yet.

While dealing with Edmund's varied reactions to storms were routine, the storm was even more unwelcome than usual. Taking Lucy's advice, Peter had somehow lured Edmund out of the library long enough to somehow persuade him to go on afternoon outing, just the two of them. Peter had hoped that some time away would quiet Edmund's nerves which had been on edge for the last week, but his plan backfired at the first crack of thunder.

"I shouldn't…I'm too old to be reacting like this," Edmund said shakily, throwing a pebble at the opposite wall in frustration.

"It's been a rough week, Ed."

Edmund eyes snapped over to Peter, a flash of hurt crossing his face before contorting into anger.

"And so oh so Magnificent Peter, should have expected little Eddie to fall to pieces? Because, well, what else is there to expect?"

Sighing, Peter pulled Edmund to him. His brother's reaction to a comment that would usually abate some of Edmund's frustration only demonstrated the toll recent events had taken on him.

"I was saying that your reaction to the storm was understandable," Peter said gently.

A loud clap of thunder caused Edmund to turn his face into Peter's shoulder for several minutes.

"I know you were trying to help. I'm sorry for getting angry," Edmund mumbled.

Peter ignored his apology. "Hey, remember when we kept swapping the sugar for other things for an entire week, and Susan kept putting salt and spices into her tea?"

Feeling Edmund's face quirk into a smile on his shoulder, he continued, "I think the funniest reaction was when we put Susan was so distracted by the Christmas party planning that she didn't even notice what she was putting into her tea were garlic gloves."

"She choked and threw her cup across the room where it landed on the weaving she'd been working on. She was furious."

Edmund laughed and disentangled himself from Peter's arm.

"She didn't speak to us for about two weeks after that. We haven't played any good pranks on her since which, I think, needs to be changed."

Edmund looked over at Peter to find Peter looking at him strangely, an astonished smile.

"What?"

"Nothing, it was just nice to hear you laugh again."


	10. Cake

**Rating: K**

**Warnings: None**

**I thought since the next fic I put out might be emotional or heavy, I'd do a short light one first. It didn't take that long since it is all dialogue. Hopefully it's still easy to understand.**

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><p>"There you are! I've been looking all over for you!"<p>

"Hm, well that's a turn of events. It's usually me and all of Narnia looking for you," Peter smiled at Edmund.

"Yes, well I wouldn't be half as good as a diplomat and strategist if I was easily found now would I? Besides, I came to talk to you about- _wait, what in all of Narnia are you doing, Pete?"_

"I'm making a cake, Ed," Peter replied as if this was the most natural thing for him to be doing in the world.

"I-I'm sorry…you're what?" Edmund spluttered.

"Now really, just because I burnt the pies for the Christmas party and tripped over a chair, and crashed into the table holding all the pastries which ended up all over the floor…doesn't mean I'm not capable of doing things in the kitchen."

"Sounds like you're pretty incapable to me," Edmund muttered.

"What did you want to talk to me about?"

"I need your help with-"

Lucy's voice floated down the stairs to the kitchen, "Peter, Edmund!"

"Oh sweet Aslan what are you doing Peter?"

"Exactly what I said, Lu."

"I'm making a-"

"Come on Lu, let's get out of here before he singes his eyebrows off, or Susan finds the mess he made."


	11. Gardening

**Rating: K**

**Warnings: None**

**This one popped into my head while doing my Spanish homework and I figured it was worth it to take ten minutes and write it. If you can catch the reference from the previous chapter, Not Scared, you will urm get...cookies? I don't know. **

**Thank you for all the reviews, story alerts, and favoriting. You are all lovely.**

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><p>Peter plopped into a chair in his brother's study. Well, Edmund's study was really the entire library with an entire desk and seating area claimed as only his. It was the one thing he'd insisted on when they had moved into Cair Paravel all those years ago.<p>

"What are you doing?" Peter asked conversationally.

Edmund raised his eyebrows irritably and turned the page of his book, "What does it look like I'm doing?"

"Knitting a sweater," Peter replied with a cheeky grin.

"You're insufferable."

Peter laughed. "That's me."

Edmund rolled his eyes and went back to reading but was distracted by Peter tapping his fingers on the table. He was silenced with a sharp glare from Edmund.

Peter remained silent for an entire minute before reaching across the table, and snatching the book from Edmund's long fingers.

"Would you sto-"

"Gardening. Really, Ed?"

Looking into Peter's smirk, Edmund promptly went red.

"I…Lucy wanted to plant one…I thought I'd help her with it. You know, research it for her…"

Peter's smirk softened. "That's nice, Eddie."

He pushed the book across the table which Edmund snapped up, not looking into Peter's face.

"Glad you think so. Don't go publicizing it to the entire castle, can't have anyone thinking their judge has gone soft," Edmund muttered sarcastically, opening the book to the page he was on before.

"I wouldn't dream of it."

"Good. Now go bother someone else."


	12. Another Sunrise

**Rating: K+**

**Warnings: None**

**I do not own Narnia or its characters.**

**So it's been a little over a month so I updated, and I'm sorry about that. It was nearing the end of the marking period, and then I was in Spain for a week.**

**I have been working on a few other chapters, but they are proving to be more difficult to write because they're heavier topics. If anyone is interested in helping out with them, I'd love the input. **

**This chapter is based off an idea that I've been meaning to turn into a larger fic for a long time, but have never done it. The idea that Edmund was captured for a long period of time, and after being found has a lot of healing to do. **

**I hope you enjoy and if anyone has any ideas or would like to help me out with the chapters I've been working on, please let me know.**

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><p>Peter finally found Edmund, in the place he should have thought to look first, on the beach with his back pressed up against one of the boulders.<p>

"Hey," Peter said quietly, dropping down next to his brother.

Edmund turned to him with a small smile and a voice even quieter than Peter's, "Hi."

Looking down at Edmund's fingers which were tracing circles in the sand, Peter sighed at the dried blood around Edmund's nails. Edmund had the habit of picking at his fingers when particularly upset and anxious. A habit that Edmund didn't always notice he was doing until blood would stain a piece of clothing or streak on the parchment he was writing on. It frustrated Susan to no end, but Peter and Lucy seemed to have taken a more understanding approach.

Peter gently grabbed Edmund's hands. Realizing what Peter was doing, Edmund curled his fingers into his palms.

"Ed," Peter warned gently. Edmund sighed but allowed Peter to unfurl his fingers to examine them.

After examining a particularly bloody finger, Peter squeezed his hands before releasing them.

"Been a rough week, huh?"

"Yeah...I thought I was ready, but I guess I wasn't," Edmund said voice soft and avoiding Peter's eyes.

Something about the way Edmund's voice was always barely above a whisper since he had been found broke Peter's heart. Edmund had always been quiet, but never timid and afraid of saying what was on his mind.

"You can't know what's going to happen or how you're going to feel until you walk in that room. You did well. I don't know if I could have been that brave. You made it so those men will never hurt you or anyone else again."

"I am the farthest thing from brave, Peter."

"I beg to differ. Let's go inside and take care of these fingers."

Helping Edmund to his feet, Peter draped an arm around Edmund's shoulder and pulled him close as they started to walk towards the castle.

Pleased at the way Edmund actually snuggled closer to Peter instead of flinching, Peter smiled. Things would be okay. Maybe not normal. They would have to redefine normal again. But with time and a lot of love Edmund would heal, and another sunrise would come.


	13. Home

**Rating for this chapter: K+**

**Warnings: None**

**I do not own Narnia or its characters.**

**Hi there, it's been a while. Senior projects, graduation, and working in another fandom has side tracked me from this story. However, I am back with a new installment. I have several others that I had started months ago and intend finishing periodically throughout the summer. **

**Sorry if there are any mistakes. It is almost 1:30 in the morning and I just finished writing, but I really wanted to put something up.**

**Enjoy.**

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><p>Peter watched his younger siblings play cricket from the terrace. He had been given very specific instructions to not even think about moving because he was meant to be resting. A valet brought him another lemonade, which he accepted graciously though he was sure if he consumed anymore he would burst.<p>

Susan touched Edmund's shoulder and said something to him that Peter couldn't hear, but whatever she said elicited a huge scowl.

Edmund stomped up the steps and plopped down in the chair next to Peter. Peter grinned at Edmund as he took a huge gulp of his older brother's lemonade.

"Have you been exiled to rest too?"

"She told me that if I even attempt to move from this chair she will put me back on bed rest for the rest of the week," Edmund huffed.

Peter laughed loudly. Edmund rolled his eyes and picked up the book he had left on the table earlier.

Peter's smile slipped however as his mind flashed back to images of the way his younger brother looked when Peter had come back from his latest campaign. Peter knew that Edmund was going to be a mess while he was gone, but he had not expected anything like what he came home to.

"Peter, you're crying," Edmund said softly.

"Oh," Peter said lamely. He hadn't noticed until now.

Edmund snapped his book shut and moved his chair closer to Peter's.

"What's wrong?"

Peter wiped the stray tears. "Nothing really…just thinking".

"About?" Edmund prompted.

Sighing Peter looked into his younger brother's concerned eyes. "You. When I came home. You had worked yourself into such a state, and Susan and Lucy were so worried. It was all my fault."

"Peter," Edmund said in a warning voice. "We already had this conversation. It wasn't your fault."

A valet came over and placed a pastry at Edmund's seat. Edmund sighed, but dutifully picked it up and began eating it with Peter watching him the entire time.

"You don't need to make sure I eat it you know," Edmund smirked.

"I know."

"I miss training," Edmund said to Peter around bites of the pastry.

"Me too. But Orieus and our darling sisters won't let us anywhere near a weapon until we're both fully recovered," Peter sighed.

"I hate being cooped up," Edmund said bitterly.

"You're not well."

"I'm fine," Edmund told Peter shortly.

"If you can call over working and worrying yourself into exhaustion, malnutrition, drastic weight loss, and constant fever…then of course you're perfectly fine, Edmund," Peter snapped back but worry colored his words underneath.

Guilt speared Edmund's gut. He hated worrying his family so much. But it was all a result of worrying about Peter. It was all ruthless cycle.

"I'm sorry, Pete," Edmund said quietly, looking at his hands.

Reaching out, Peter cupped the back of Edmund's neck and running his fingers through Edmund's hair. It had grown out in the months he had been away, curling into to tendrils around his younger brother's neck. As soon as Edmund was better, Peter was sure Susan would be running after him with a pair of scissors.

"We already had this conversation, Eddie."

"Right," Edmund replied softly and picked up his book.

Peter didn't remove his hand but continued to play with Edmund's curls as he read.

After some time, Edmund began to yawn and his eyes began to droop. Edmund being Edmund was too stubborn to admit defeat and take a nap, so Peter smiled a little to himself before announcing he was going inside to lie down.

Peter could practically feel his younger brother's narrowed eyes burning into his back as he walked back into the Castle.

Just as Peter expected, Edmund entered his room several minutes later.

"Are you okay?"

"Just a little tired, Ed." Peter patted bed for Edmund to join him with a raised eyebrow.

Edmund curled against Peter's chest and within minutes the warmth of the room and the comfort of his older brother got to him, and he fell asleep.

With the pressure of his brother against his chest, his sister's laughter floating through the window, and the sweet Narnian air filling his nostrils, Peter smiled. It was good to be home.


	14. Unsettled Argument

**Rating for this chapter: K+/T**

**Warnings: None really except general angst.**

**I'm getting frustrated with this story. All my chapters feel stupid. Oh well. **

**Enjoy.**

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><p>"Are you okay?"<p>

Limping over, Edmund sat down heavily next to Peter on the bench.

"I think the better question would be, are _you _okay?" Peter said softly.

Edmund looked at him sideways, taking in the sharp lines illuminated in the moonlight that had been appearing on his older brother's face in the past few years.

"I'm fine, Peter. Just sore."

"If Lucy hadn't gotten there in time…"

"Peter don't…"

"…your leg would still be twisted in that ghastly manner, and you were losing blood so fast…"

"Peter. Stop," Edmund said sharply, putting his hand on Peter's shoulder. "I'm fine. You have to stop this ruminating. I'm fine. I'm right here. It doesn't do you any good when you do this."

Peter sighed. "I know….I just can't…can't stop."

Edmund opened his mouth to reply, but Peter leapt off the bench and began pacing agitatedly.

"I just…Why do you have to be so bloody noble?

"I-"

"_You were just lying there Edmund!"_

"I know, I-"

"_And I couldn't get to you, and Lucy wasn't there! What if you had died?"_

"Peter, I didn't-"

"_I can't keep losing you!"_

"What are you-"

"_Do you even know how close it was this time?"_

"_What was I supposed to do, Peter? Let you get crushed by that ogres club? Let you get chopped up by those minotaurs' axes? I can't let that happen!" _

Peter stopped pacing and shouting abruptly after Edmund's outburst. He stood there chest rising and falling heavily.

"I can't lose you, Ed," Peter whispered softly.

"And you think I can lose you?" Edmund countered just as quietly.

Peter said nothing but turned to rest his arms on the railing of the balcony, and stared out at the sea. Edmund shifted to a more comfortable position, glad that Peter's back was turned so he couldn't see him wince.

After several minutes, Peter walked back and sat next to Edmund.

"We're never going to settle this are we?"

"No, I don't think so."

"Well in that case, I think we should both be in bed."


	15. Marriage Proposal

**Rating for this chapter: K**

**Warnings: None**

**I do not own Narnia or it's characters.**

**This is short and silly. It just came to me so I thought I would write it in addition to addressing something in my reviews.**

**I have been asked to write a story that explains Chapter 12 multiple times. I would love to do but I'm terrible with longer stories and I don't really know what I would do with it. If someone would be willing to help out or beta/offer some guidance I may consider writing it. If someone wants to help me out it wouldn't be anything major- more like looking through what I've written or offering any ideas you might have.**

**Or if someone could kick around a few ideas with me in the outline process. That'd be amazing.**

**So yes.**

**Enjoy.**

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><p>"King Edmund!" A fawn called him as he exited the library. "Your brother wishes to see you in his study!"<p>

Edmund smiled and thanked the fawn before heading off in the direction of his older brother's study.

"You wanted to see me your Majesty?" Edmund smirked at him with a quirked his eyebrow.

Peter would have normally laughed at this but instead he was focused on an unopened envelope in his hand.

"This is addressed to me but it says that you need to open it," Peter told him.

Edmund's face contorted into confusion. "That's odd," he replied, as he approached Peter's desk.

Peter handed him the envelope silently, a look of apprehension on his face. Taking the envelope in his hand, Edmund lowered himself into a chair and began to read the letter within.

His face paled with each sentence.

"What? What does it say, Ed?"

Wordlessly Edmund handed Peter the letter.

In contrast to his brother, Peter turned redder with each sentence.

"Well if I ever-," Peter began to explode.

"Don't worry, Peter. I was not going to even consider it. The letter is ghastly within itself, I cannot imagine her personality."


	16. Hair Ribbons

**Rating for this chapter: K**

**Warnings: Extreme silliness.**

**I do not own Narnia or its characters.**

**Short and crazy.**

**In the mean time I think I will start working on an outline for the story that goes with Chapter 12. I will also be probably posting a one shot of a Lucy/Ed siblingfic very soon. So look out for Chapter 12 story and my one shot if you're interested.**

**Enjoy.**

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><p>Edmund had a way of getting so involved in his work or a book that he could become oblivious to absolutely everything around him. This made him a perfect target for Peter and Lucy to tease him. Susan didn't approve even though she was often seen laughing along with her siblings.<p>

Lucy tried to hide her giggle as she watched Peter carry out their latest prank. Lucy would have loved to be the one putting her hair ribbons in Edmund's dark curls but she could never pull it off without bursting into laughter and potentially ruining the whole thing.

As Peter put the last bright pink hair ribbon in his younger brother's hair, he grinned at Lucy, grabbed her hand, and led her out of the library.

Hours later Edmund's angry shouts could be heard throughout the entire castle.

The servants watched as their kings ran through the halls, one shouting, and one laughing.


	17. Promises

**Ratings for this chapter: K+**

**Warnings: none**

**I do not own Narnia or its characters.**

**I was watching the movie/documentary thing they made on the creation of the LLW movie in the four disc special edition, and the director was talking about Edmund's character. He described his relationship with Peter as someone who was probably once his best friend but has probably drifted apart and now has taken on a fatherly role after the upset of their father leaving for the war.**

**So this story is examining that idea and I thought it was an interesting way of looking at looking at Peter and Edmund's earlier relationship and how it fell apart. This is focusing on Mrs. Pevensie's view of things. I don't know how came up with the name Colin for Mr. Pevensie but I have seen it used in several fics so I figured I'd use it too.**

**I am still working on that one shot, I was going to wait to post everything at once but the one shot is proving frustrating. But that's enough of my rambling. Enjoy.**

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><p>Thunder crashed and rumbled so deeply the house shook. Lightning flashed and illuminated a wide-eyed Edmund standing in Peter's doorway.<p>

"Well, come on Eddie," Peter said while lifting up his duvet.

Edmund ran as fast as his little legs could carry him and dived under Peter's blanket, snuggling up against his older brother.

"Daddy said I need to be a big boy, but-but-but I tried, Peter," Edmund all but wailed.

Another clap of thunder shook the house, causing Edmund's shoulders to tremble. Peter pulled him closer and ran his fingers through the five year olds' dark curls.

"I know, it's okay. You can stay here with me."

"What if Daddy is mad?"

"He won't be. You just tell him you tried," Peter kissed the top of Edmund's head.

Wrinkling his nose Edmund told Peter, "Mark said kissing is for girls and sissies."

"Mark is an idiot."

"An idiot?"

"Yes."

"So is Mark wrong?"

"Promise?"

"Promise."

The next morning Helen found Edmund pressed against her eldest son's side, with Peter's arms wrapped protectively around him. Colin entered behind Helen and the two shared an exasperated smile.

888

Edmund waited eagerly sitting at the kitchen table as his mother sorted through the mail.

"Sorry darling, there's nothing from Peter."

She smiled sadly at him as he slid out of the chair with a sigh, and stomped up the stairs.

Edmund had told Helen that Peter _promised _to write. Peter _promised _to tell him about school. Peter _promised _not to forget him. Peter _promised. _

But Helen knew Peter was an eleven year old boy with his first year at boarding school, coursework, and new friends to take on. She wasn't surprised but couldn't help being slightly disappointed at the promises he broke to Edmund.

When Peter came home for the summer holiday Edmund was angry with him for the span of about ten minutes before Peter apologized and Edmund smiled. Helen didn't see one without the other for the rest of the summer.

888

The boy who stepped off the school train was not the same excited and nervous boy who stepped on it back in September.

The 12 year old was much quieter and withdrawn than he had been when he left although he'd never been quite as loud and bubbly as Lucy. He was prone angry outbursts that often landed him in his father's study Edmund often stayed in their longer than a normal scolding should last and Helen suspected he would talk to Colin about what troubled him or the latest book he had been reading.

Peter had told their parents that he suspected the older boys at school pushed Edmund around. Peter said he couldn't be sure though, he hardly ever saw Edmund.

Scenes from the previous summers were few and far between. Peter was due to turn fifteen in two weeks. He had befriended the boys down the street and was often with a boy named Mark.

"Peter?"

"Hm?"

"Want to play a game of cricket with the girls? Susan is home."

"Sorry, Ed. I told Mark I'd have a game of football today. How about tomorrow?"

"Susan going to Mary-what's her name's house- tomorrow. And who says you won't go play with Mark or Robert after you said you'd play with me?" Helen could hear Edmund's voice rising from the kitchen.

"Look, I'm sorry. I swear we'll play some time soon."

The front door opened and shut, and Edmund could be heard stomping up the stairs muttering, "You promised me Mark was an idiot."

888

Gloom hung like a thick fog over the Pevensie household which seemed Peter felt seemed cold without his father's smile, and the smoke of his pipe accompanying the rustle of newspaper.

"Edmund, please eat your dinner."

Edmund scorned at his plate and pushed its contents around. "I don't like corned beef."

"I know sweetie, but that's the best ration I could get."

Edmund sighed and glared at his plate.

"Ed," Peter scolded him sharply.

The chair scraped across the floor and Edmund's footsteps pounded into Colin's study.

Late that night Helen sat in the kitchen stirring her tea and mulling over the day's events. Edmund was angrier by the minute and she didn't know how to help him. Peter was doing as well as he could taking over the role as the man of the house, but this only fueled Edmund's anger. Susan helped out more. Lucy put on a brave face.

Her musings were interrupted by a soft, "Mum".

She looked up to see Edmund standing hesitantly in the doorway of the kitchen, his pale face tinted yellow by the old light.

Smiling softly at him she stood to warm up the dinner that had long since gone cold.

888

As Helen carried up the last freshly cleaned socks upstairs, she heard her two sons arguing. Dropping off the socks into Lucy's room, she made a beeline for Peter's.

"Stop it both of you," she said sternly. "Edmund, I know this is hard but you must behave yourself while you're away. Let Peter take care of you."

"I don't need to be taken care of by anyone, let alone a git like Peter."

"I'm the git?-" Peter was cut off by a stern look from his mother.

"It's going to be a long day tomorrow and we must be at the train station early. We could all do with a good night of rest."

888

The station of was filled to the brim with anxious and impatient mothers waiting for their children.

Despite the tensions before they left, Helen missed her children. The house had been cold and empty without them

She held her breath as the first few rows of doors were opened and children poured out. A dark haired, freckled face boy hopped off first. She let out a long, surprised breath as watched the dark haired boy help out a girl with shoulder length brown hair out of the train. _These were her children?_

Peter hopped out next, handing Edmund his suitcase which Edmund took with a grin. Susan was helped out last by Peter, who gave her a slight bow causing Susan to smile widely.

Lucy caught site of Helen and waved, alerting the others to her location. When they got to her Peter had his arm wrapped around Edmund, a sight she hadn't seen in a long time.

The others seemed to hang back a bit. Peter gave Edmund's shoulder a squeeze and a slight push forward.

"Hello, mum," Edmund greeted her with a hug. She hugged him back looking at all her children in amazement.

_These were her children._

Early the next morning she couldn't help herself but check on all her children, praying that whatever had happened in the country hadn't been a magic spell that would be broken at sunrise.

She found Edmund curled up against Peter, and she'd never been more grateful.


	18. Panic and Communication

**Hey everyone! It's been a while since I've added anything to this fic. It's a little rusty but I hope you enjoy it. I've also written another story called "Letting go" which will probably be a three parter if I ever get my butt working on it before school starts, that I'd love some feedback on. (I'm just a little rusty at fanfiction these days...) Thanks always for reading. **

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><p>It had been a long time since they had argued the way they just had, and Peter wasn't sure how things had gotten so bad. Maybe it was the stress of having to make their first treaty even though they were well within the fourth year of their reign. Maybe it was the rapidly chilling weather. Maybe it was just a bad day.<p>

Peter doesn't have the answers and he doesn't know if Edmund does because Edmund left the room in tears a ten minutes ago, leaving Peter staring blankly at this bedroom wall.

Peter sighed. He doesn't know if he should go after Edmund or not. Edmund would need space, but was getting rather late, and who knows where Edmund would run off to.

Pulling himself up from the bed, Peter put on his boots and decided to start with searching the castle.

He didn't even get to the girl's corridor before he heard laboured breathing at the end of the hall.

Rushing around the corner of a stone lamp, Peter found Edmund lying on the floor, struggling to breathe.

"Edmund…" Peter rushed over to him and pulled him up so he was leaning against his chest.

"Come on, Ed, breathe, breathe with me, in and out, follow the way my chest moves on your back".

"LUCY! SUSAN! TUFTFIN! ANYONE! HELP!"

Footsteps and hooves clattered to where Peter was holding Edmund on the floor.

"Your Majesty," Tuftin the faun hastily bowed, "What ever is the matter?"

"Peter, Peter what is wrong?" Lucy cried, joining her brothers on the floor.

"His injury is acting up and I think he's having an attack like the ones he gets when he's upset!" Peter informed her.

"Okay, Peter, you need to remain calm. Can you do that?" Lucy looked him dead in the eye. "Peter, you have to try."

"Yeah, I can do that," Peter said quietly, steadying himself.

"Ed? Eddie," Lucy took Edmund's hands. "Look at me, please."

It took a few moments, but Edmund finally met Lucy's eyes.

"There you go, now don't take your eyes off of me and breathe with Peter and I."

Slowly, Lucy and Peter got Edmund's breathing to steady, but it was still shallow.

"Truftkin, I need you to please fetch a healer first, and then find Susan and bring her to Ed's quarters," Lucy instructed the valet.

"Of course, your majesty."

Normally Lucy would have told Edmund's valet to please and thank you stop calling her "your Majesty" but she wasn't concerned about that at the moment.

"Peter, lift Edmund up and take him to his quarters."

Several hours later, Edmund was faring much better. He had peppermint soaked clothes lying across his chest and several calming salts by his bedside, as well as some tea.

The dryad healer checked his chest injury, and said all was well it was just agitated and suggested that Edmund take it easy for a few days, and to keep taking his herbals.

Peter had thanked everyone for their help but left out the reason Edmund had an attack, the shame boring into his stomach. He pulled Edmund's plush reading chair closer to his bed, and watched him to sleep guilt making him nauseous. He shouldn't have been so hard on Edmund. He should have asked him what was bothering him instead of yelling at him about late work that Edmund had already apologized and agonized over. He should have…

Edmund sat up, looking down at all the salts and peppermint soaked clothes on him and surrounding him in confusion. Finally, his eyes landed on Peter sitting by his bedside, and immediately looked as if someone had quickly burned him and looked down.

Peter slowly stood up and sat on the foot of Edmund's bed.

"Ed...I...I'm sorry. I should have known better. I know you're doing everything you can to get those papers done. I know that you're not feeling well because of your injury and the fact that it's winter and you're still working through stuff. I know that I haven't exactly been...available to help you...I've just been so stressed out and I let that get in the way of your wellbeing. I'm sorry, Eddie. I'm so sorry." By the end of Peter's apology tears were streaming down his face.

Edmund was silent.

Peter looked at him intently, but as the silence wore on Peter looked down and started playing with the fraying hem of his tunic.

Edmund let out a shuddering breath and a quaky, "I'm sorry too, Pete. I just...I shouldn't have said those things to you, let myself get back into my old ways. I was just so...frustrated."

Peter moved to the other side of the bed so he could be eye level with his brother. "It's alright, Ed. We can work on this. We can work on better communicating with each other. We'll have some bumps in the road, but it'll be okay. I will love you no matter what."

Edmund flushed, and looked down. Peter grinned knowing that he had thoroughly embarrassed yet made Edmund happy.

"I...I'm sorry about...all of...this." Edmund gestured to the herbals and the tea.

"It's not your fault, Eddie. Just make sure you follow the doctor's orders." Peter winked at him.

"A sound bit of advice Peter. Perhaps, you should set a better example for Edmund here, hmmm?" Susan walked in smiling at her brothers.

"Yes, my dear sister, that would probably wise," Peter bowed playfully for Susan.

Giggling, Susan rolled her eyes. "I hope you two have learned your lesson about taking care of yourselves and eachother now. Which means, now, Peter Pevensie, you should be off to bed….now."

Susan started checking Edmund's injuries and his temperature.

Peter scrambled off of Ed's bed but not before whispering, "Don't worry, I'll be back later to save you."

Edmund winked and submitted to Susan's mothering (smothering).


End file.
